And in Hollywood - Where reality is just another thing you fake

SHE’S OUT! Now let’s hope Paris Hilton learned a thing or three in jail. Remember Paris - an OLD airhead is not pretty sight.

Ooops - my bad! Cameron Diaz has apologized for opening up old wounds in Peru when she sported a designer handbag with a Red China Star and a quote from Mao Zedong’s little red book. It brought up bad memories of the Maoist Shining Path insurgency during the 80’s and 90’s. The would be thugs’ attempt to ‘Serve the People’ killed 70,000 of them and left a bad taste all over Peru’s psyche. Cameron wished “for their continued healing,” and said she once had a bad experience with Chinese culture herself. She learned how to play Chop Sticks on the piano - and wouldn’t you know it - an hour later she wanted to learn another song.

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Inconvenient Quotes

“And on the seventh day God rested. That’s when he asked me to take over.”

Today’s pundit: Heywood Broun (American Writer, 1888-1939)

Appeasers believe that if you keep on throwing steaks to a tiger, the tiger will become a vegetarian.

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News Fit to Quip Remember - no one is perfect - until they write their campaign literature of course

The non-war war. Seems the Iranians are doing a little more than just supplying their surrogates in Iraq with weapons. According to a report in The Sun, military radar sighted Iranian helicopters crossing the Iraqi desert. While British troops spotted the Iranian Revolutionary Guard crossing over into southern Iraq. A British intelligence source said, “It is an extremely alarming development and raises the stakes considerably. In effect, it means we are in a full on war with Iran — but nobody has officially declared it.” Kinda scary knowing how the government on both sides of the pond think a ‘pretty please’ will stop the Middle East war build-up. I guess most of these officials missed their true calling - should’ve been characters actors. ‘Cause when they finally show any character - they’re acting.

First you have the Syrians military build- up along the Israeli boarder. Now a Syrian parliament member Mohammad al Habash said on Al Jazeera that Syria was, “actively preparing for war with Israel” and he expected it to break out this summer. Israel’s Military Intelligence Chief Amos Yadlin agrees. Iran and its surrogates, Hizbullah, Hamas, World Jihad and Syria “are all actively working against Israel, and may force a conflict as early as this summer.” Israel’s Prime Minister Ehud Olmert isn’t much help as he begins yet another Neville Chamberlain bargain for peace. Did you know, Olmert’s head once tried to commit suicide. Claimed it was living an empty life.

Ummmm, yummy. Dirty food, foul-smelling food, food with high levels of heavy metals, poisonous mold and dioxins all imported into Sweden from China. During the first five months of this year the number of dangerous Chinese imports nearly doubled from 88 to 138 cases. Now the government is talking about mandating a new warning label on certain food products - Caution! Made in China.

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Report From Liliputian Land - Where it’s the ANNOYING who inherit the earth

Bush accidently spoke the truth Tuesday when he described the newly resuscitated Senate Immigration Reform bill as amnesty. Kennedy immediately hogtied Bush and washed his mouth out with soap.

Labor unions aren’t the only ones worried about a creation of a cheap underclass of laborers. Unemployment is higher and wages are falling in areas where illegals have become the labor force de jure. “Even in the economy as a whole, real wages for 93 million non-supervisory, private sector workers fell again in April.” Those who actually work for a living aren’t happy to see this deluge of flesh. But for Bush and his pals - Happiness is a green card in every illegal’s pot.

Of course the real losers in this Greek Tragedy are minimally educated USA citizens. In a Georgia study, the jobs for these folks declined from 71% to 66% in favor of the underclass immigrant - legal and illegal. And as any economics professor will tell you, when something is in short supply the price will go UP not stagnate. So how come the businesses in Georgia who whine about labor shortages have increased wages by only 1% in the last six years. Or why native-born teenagers able to find work have gone from 22% to 11%. Unlike the politicians who want to pass this bill, American citizens don’t have the opportunity to live off the fatheads of the land.

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Sleaze-noid News With two sides to every story - Local and Network

FOX News owner Rupert Murdoch’s China connection is attracting as much attention as his bid for Dow Jones and The Wall Street Journal. The New York Times (sorta like the pot calling the kettle black) is doing a series on the tycoon, his mainland Chinese wife Wendi and his pals in Red China. According to the NYT, Rupert works hand in hand with Chinese censors, and buddies up with Chinese pols to protect his back-end in case some other element in the corrupt Chinese government takes issue with his media dealings. In a letter to Dow Jones shareholders, Chinese based reporters said Murdoch is “sacrificing journalistic integrity to satisfy personal and political aims.” Murdoch did deny one of their allegations though. He did NOT get a tattoo in China that says “For Sale.”

Sen. Trent Lott, (R-Miss), is pissed. “Talk radio is running America. We have to deal with that problem.” He said some radio hosts do not know what is in the lengthy illegal immigration bill. (Uh, who does Trent?) Center for American Progress did a report “The Structural Imbalance of Political Talk Radio” to lament the only talk radio able to draw more than just flies - is conservative. So the fix is in - maybe. Senator Feinstein (D-CA) wants to re-instate the unfair ‘Fairness Doctrine’ to hogged tied any political debate in this country that could shine a light on the shenanigans in Congress. Ahhh politicians - part of their time is spent passing laws - the rest is spent evading them.

Katie Couric isn’t the only pretty face having rating problems. Brian Williams of the “NBC Nightly News” lost 5% of his viewers (533,000) compared to Katie’s 4% (287,000) dive. When Williams first replaced Tom Brokaw, NBC averaged 10.79 million viewers. In the last three months it’s fallen to 7.66 million. Maybe the viewing public took issue with Williams’ reporting style. Like in June 2005 when he compared America’s first presidents to then president-elect of Iran, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. After all America’s first presidents were “certainly revolutionaries and might have been called terrorists by the British crown.” You know Williams reminds me of Dan Rather. Both of them are vain. In fact, if either one of them went on an ego trip - they’d come back with souvenirs.

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The Chicken Little Report - The weather - brought to you by Bossy - and a good MOOO to you!

Watch out - Hot Rocks! Seems we in the USA owe our ‘uplifting’ position on the continental shelf to hot rocks below the Earth’s crust. “Researchers have failed to appreciate how heat makes rock in the continental crust and upper mantle expand to become less dense and more buoyant.” Says Derrick Hasterok, a graduate student in geology and geophysics and his professor, David Chapman. Global Warmest are getting out their tripewriter so they can claim another victim of Global Warming!

ALERT! Global Warming Monster ID! The worms done it. Research director at the Composting Association, Jim Frederickson, is worried about a German study detailing how worms produce greenhouse gases 290 times worse than an SUV. “Everybody… thinks they can do no harm but they contribute to global warming. People are looking into alternative waste treatments but we have to make sure that we are not jumping from the frying pan into the fire.” Hey Jim. I’m doing my part to save the world! Just joined a car pool. Have to admit - I AM having a little trouble getting the bathing suit on my Toyota.

Freedom, not climate, is at risk
By Vaclav Klaus, President of the Czech Republic

The author Michael Crichton stated it clearly: “the greatest challenge facing mankind is the challenge of distinguishing reality from fantasy, truth from propaganda”. I feel the same way, because global warming hysteria has become a prime example of the truth versus propaganda problem. It requires courage to oppose the “established” truth, although a lot of people – including top-class scientists – see the issue of climate change entirely differently. They protest against the arrogance of those who advocate the global warming hypothesis and relate it to human activities.

As someone who lived under communism for most of his life, I feel obliged to say that I see the biggest threat to freedom, democracy, the market economy and prosperity now in ambitious environmentalism, not in communism. This ideology wants to replace the free and spontaneous evolution of mankind by a sort of central (now global) planning.

The environmentalists ask for immediate political action because they do not believe in the long-term positive impact of economic growth and ignore both the technological progress that future generations will undoubtedly enjoy, and the proven fact that the higher the wealth of society, the higher is the quality of the environment. They are Malthusian pessimists…

I agree with Professor Richard Lindzen from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, who said: “future generations will wonder in bemused amazement that the early 21st century’s developed world went into hysterical panic over a globally averaged temperature increase of a few tenths of a degree, and, on the basis of gross exaggerations of highly uncertain computer projections combined into implausible chains of inference, proceeded to contemplate a roll-back of the industrial age”.

Excerpted from The Financial Times Limited
June 13, 2007

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And in Hollywood - Where reality is just another thing you fake

The press isn’t buying Angelina Jolie’s excuse ‘my lawyer made me do it.’ See it was an oversight that FOX news was banned from red carpet interviews for her new flick. But why she stood-up the rest of the media or made them sign contracts for a chance to speak to the divine Angelina wasn’t mentioned. The movie Jolie was supposed to shill for was “A Mighty Heart,” a flick about reporter Daniel Pearl and his beheading by ‘religion of pieces’ jihadist. So it’s kinda ironic the way the press was treated considering the event was to raise money for Reporters Without Borders. They say this Goodwill Ambassador to the world is a thoughtful person. So - just how many Angelina Jolies DOES it take to come up with a single thought?

Speaking of irony. Seems Paris Hilton’s four day stint in jail was the average. 60% of those guilty of the same stupidity - drunk driving and later a probation violation or driving without a license - did that amount of time. Doing the full 23 days means the Simple Life star got special treatment alright, more time than 80% of her fellow drunks. Da judge uses his mean streak to good advantage in other things though. For instance, he can fry his eggs just by staring at them.

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Inconvenient Quotes

“And on the seventh day God rested. That’s when he asked me to take over.”

Today’s pundit: Unknown

After all is said and done, more is said than done.

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News Fit to Quip Remember - no one is perfect - until they write their campaign literature of course

Hans von Spakovsky came hat in hand to the Federal Election Commission last week to take the same ol’ same ol’ at the hands of the happy Hollywood Dems and their love for knee-capping GW Bush political appointees. Mr. von Spakovsky’s crime is supporting state voter ID laws. A former voting rights section chief, Joseph Rich, says von Spakovsky blocked lawsuits and stopped investigations. Uh Joe - you mean like those ‘sloppy, over-reaching’ law suits you guys dreamed up and the Supreme Court called “an embarrassment?” Gee, the happy Hollywood Dems always brag about how patriotic they are - but then - they lie about other things too!

Getting tired of the happy Hollywood Dems continual attack mode on GW Bush? If not, you’ll be happy to know they’ve got new angle. In an effort to protect us from the president, House Oversight Committee dug up that 37 White House Aides’ GOP email accounts are missing. Committee chairman Henry Waxman (D-CA) interprets this as a smoking gun for “extensive” violations of the law. That’s nice Henry. But could you guys put down the hatchet and do something different now - like the PEOPLE’S business. You know, little things like fixing Social Security. ‘Cause very soon we’ll all be saying: NEVER BEFORE HAVE SO FEW - OWED SO MUCH - TO SO MANY!

China has a dirty little secret it gets huffy about if you ask. See they’re still priming their war machinery. 900 Chinese missiles are now aimed at Taiwan in addition to their growing inventory of long-range nuclear missiles, combat planes, warships and submarines. All this worries the Department of Defense, Richard Lawless, the Pentagon’s deputy undersecretary for Asia-Pacific affairs. “We must plan and prepare for the worst. It is an area of intense concern.” Of course China thinks it’s just being a good capitalist and need the weapon manufacturing for their export business too. After all Iran would have trouble waging their proxy war in Iraq, Afghanistan and elsewhere without China’s weapons. Ahhh China - they know all the answers. Trouble is they won’t let anybody to ask the questions.

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Report From Liliputian Land - Where it’s the ANNOYING who inherit the earth

Seems Bush really really wants Mexican trucks to roam USA highways. The House passed The Safe American Roads Act of 2007 by 411 to 3 which means new safety requirements were to be met FIRST before one rattle trap from South of the Border hits our roads. But little Georgie is telling the Senate not to bother with THAT law ‘cause a better toothless version is already contained in (HR 2206) Iraq supplemental bill. With illegal immigrant amnesty, dumb plans to re-arm the Palestinian Fatah terrorists and this trucking thing - Bush has gone too far. Now the questions is - how can we get him to stay there?

Out - out damn District Attorney Mike Nifong! - or words to that effect were uttered by Superior Court Judge Orlando Hudson. Hudson told the sheriff to stop Nifong from carrying out ANY duties as North Carolina’s Durham County District Attorney. Mike has other problems too. The families of the exonerated Duke University lacrosse players spent millions defending the kids’ bad taste in entertainment and just may sue Nifong. Ah the price lacrosse players pay for being in the same state with a Dem seeking reelection.

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